In trouble.

Ella got in trouble at school today for not coming in when the bell rang at recess.  Her punishment?  Singing or dancing in front of the class.  She told me her day was horrible.  Just horrible.  Later, when we were doing homework, she told me that her teacher said that if she did not do a better job next time, she would get a spanking.  Spankings in schools happen regularly.  This culture is very shame and obligation based.  (There are also a lot of empty threats that happen, specifically in regards to children- but yes, spankings happen.)  The things that teachers do and tell the kids at school are crazy. One example:  If a student is late, the rest of the class, in unison says, "Buenas tardes tortugita!"(Good afternoon little turtle!)  Class rankings are public. Different.

Of course my heart starts to beat a bit faster when I hear of my girl being threatened with a spanking and the mama bear within me wants to pull her out of school right away or march down and tell the teacher that she will NOT spank my child.  However, when I step back and re-evaluate, she is okay and I realize that it is my responsibility to help her through this reality.  What she is experiencing is real life.  It is not about boosting confidence and giving false praise.  It is real life where there are real consequences for her behavior.  This is something that we have been drilling into her little head for 6 years, that bad behavior equals a bad consequence.  Now it is happening in her life outside of the home and that is okay!  It is okay, because we are still very close and are able to guide her through it.  It is the next step in her growing up.  I wouldn't choose for her to be spanked, but we are living in a different culture and I am not going to isolate her, because of this cultural norm that we are experiencing.  It does reminds me to make sure that I am talking to her each day, and that I am talking to her teacher.  If she is doing something that is worthy of a swat, I need to know about it!

Ella and I were able to have a great talk about doing things right today.  It made my heart ache a bit, because it means she is growing up.  The expectations are being raised and that is okay.  It is still a hard reality for me to face. She is very self-motivated and is naturally concerned with things being "they way they should", so being told to do better by her teacher was a hard pill to swallow.  However, she can improve.  We were able to talk about why we exist (to glorify God) and that in everything we do, our goal should be to do it well in order to bring glory to God.  We do this not because it makes Him love us more, but because that is our purpose and He deserves our best.

For some reason at bed time, she picked out the Little Drummer Boy book and asked me to sing it to her.  I almost didn't.  "Really", I thought, "Let's just get to bed!"  But, I went ahead and sang to her.  When I sang this verse: "I played my best for Him pa-rum-pa-pa-pa-pum. . ."I heard her little voice whisper, "Momma, just like I do my best for God at school!"

My sweet Ella Rose.  Yes, just like that.